The Feminism of Initiating Sex

I was listening to a Ted Talk this morning about sexless marriages and how this leads to affairs and dissatisfaction within the marriage.

I found it interesting and there was something that stuck out to me that she touches on. How women are so much less likely to initiate sex, and how this frustrates men and leads to tension in a relationship. I was curious to know more so I researched reasoning behind why women are less likely to initiate. I knew that it had less to do with a desire for sexual activity and more to do with Continue reading “The Feminism of Initiating Sex”

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The Phases of Life: As Told by a Newly 24 Year Old.

I turn twenty-four today.

I feel like twenty-four is almost like then end of an era for me, like the end of a chapter of my life. I’m entering my mid-twenties and slowly figuring out what I’m going to do with my life, I have a steady job and am doing less late night partying and more staying home and watching Netflix.

I categorize my life into phases, each new beginning of a phase starts with a certain age. I can remember each one and I can remember the feelings and who I was during these times, and I assume other people do this too. These phases have helped me grow and become who I am, and I will continue to grow and become someone different as the years go on.

So in honor of turning twenty-four I’d like to share with everyone the phases of my life that I’ve gone through, and maybe you can relate and reminisce on your own life phases as well.

Phase 1: Birth to adolescence. Basically my childhood, I had a really fun exciting childhood. Me and my siblings were constantly outside playing and adventuring in the woods. I did this until I was probably fourteen, I always wanted to be outside trying to find the next expedition to go on. In these years I went through a tomboy phase and didn’t really outgrow it until high school.

Phase 2: The teenage years. Here I was rebellious and so arrogant. I didn’t understand life as much as I thought I did then, I was always late to school and while I was a good student, I was always trying to find ways to get out of class or skip study hall. I worked a lot and had some good friends. I never drank or did any drugs in high school, we always did things like snowmobiling or four-wheeling, mud runs or truck pulls to have fun. I had two boyfriends in high school, one was freshman and sophomore year and one was Junior year and beyond. This phase ended probably around age eighteen when I left for college.

Phase 3: Early college. This was when I was just learning who I was and trying to figure out what I was supposed to do now that I had all this new found freedom. I didn’t drink too much in the early years of college, I had a boyfriend who was extremely against it. We were working on a long distance relationship so I’d just drink anyway without telling him. These years were really tough for me because I was being pulled in so many different directions by my parents and my friends and my boyfriend and I was really unsure what I wanted to do, I ended up transferring home and moved back in with my mom my junior year because the stress was a lot.

Phase 4: Late college and beyond. After I had lived with my mom for about a year I moved in with this girl I barely knew in a log cabin in the woods (against my boyfriend’s wishes). I can say that this period of my life has been the most fun filled with the most memories, I graduated from college and got out of a mentally abusive relationship, which led me to find a really great group of friends who gave me some really awesome stories to tell. I partied a lot and drank a lot and experimented with all the things that most people do in college. I met an amazing guy who I fell madly in love with and we moved in together. (This is over the span of two years).

Phase 5: Middle adulthood. Now here I am, exiting that fun period of my life and settling down more and more. The more I think about going out and spending money on expensive drinks to stand in a crowded room of people the more I want to just grab a six pack and sit at home with a movie, my boyfriend and our dog. I’m excited to see what’s in store for this year and who I become.

Thanks for reading! What are the phases of your life? 

Lies We Tell Ourselves When We’re in a Mentally Controlling Relationship

It’s hard to know see that you’re in a mentally controlling relationship because the person who is controlling you is probably doing his/her best to make sure you don’t see it that way. And assuming that you love this person who is controlling you, you want to believe that they really do that your best interest at heart.

We tell ourselves that he/she loves us, that they maybe see something that we don’t and that’s the reason they’re trying to control a certain aspect of our lives. When my ex didn’t Continue reading “Lies We Tell Ourselves When We’re in a Mentally Controlling Relationship”

Why You Should Reconsider College.

College was easily the best time of my life. It’s a time in life that has the perfect mix of freedom and security. You can stumble into your dorm room while the sun is coming up and sleep until your first class at 1pm, and you can always call your parents when you need some extra money to buy an e-book for that class you had hoped would be an easy A. Showing up to class hungover is acceptable (usually) and for me personally, it’s where I learned a lot about myself. Continue reading “Why You Should Reconsider College.”